HORNEYTOPIA™

Welcome to my blog! I write about sex and relationships from my perspective as a regular woman. Leave a comment, I love them! If you have any questions, requests, or if you'd like to be a guest blogger, then contact me on Twitter (@yogachikk)!

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Don't be selfish!

This is about the complaints I hear over and over again as a sex blogger...so, I'm going to address them, but the answer to all of them is the same. DON'T BE SELFISH!

Guys complain that they will her eat pussy but, she won't suck cock.  Girls...don't be selfish.  If he is eating your pussy, then it's only fair that you suck his cock. Now, if there is a reason you don't want too, like he gags you, you don't like swallowing or spitting, you find the taste objectionable, or some other reason....the best thing you can do is tell him your reason, and try to find a solution together.  Guys, don't get all bent out of shape if she tells you something you don't want to hear.  HONEST communication is key and that communication can't and won't happen if it's met with anger or disappointment.  You want to have a discussion like adults and come up with a plan that will make both of you happy. 

Example:  She doesn't like to deep throat and you keep pulling her down on your cock choking her.  Ok, stop that!  Let her decide how deep she wants to take you in her mouth/throat.  She's doing the sucking, she gets to choose how far down she goes.  She doesn't like the taste/texture.  Ladies, buck up...it's never going to taste like cotton candy, so take his cock to the back of your mouth when he's about to cum, that way you can swallow without really tasting much of anything, plus you get brownie points for swallowing!  You find his odor stinky, c'mon guys if you know you've had sweaty balls all day, how about giving them a quick wash for her.  If that is what gets you a blow job, then why wouldn't you??  So, it boils down to this..communicate, listen, action, and don't be selfish.

Another complaint I get is that the guy just wants to lay there and she has to do all the work, usually by riding him.  Here again..DON'T BE SELFISH!  Sex is about give and take, and the pleasure that comes from that.  It's not your time to lay back and expect your partner to give you an orgasm.  Because, she will be so intent on trying to make you cum, and the cardio workout she's getting in the meantime, that her orgasm will either be non-existent or faked.  Laying back and taking in the show is fun sometimes, but if it's become your go-to sex position then you're being selfish.  You get on top, or behind for a change, give her an orgasm first.  So, this boils down to this...sex is a 2 participant sport, so get in there champ! When you are both giving then you both end up receiving and that is what sex should be.  If one person always gives and the other always takes, well you're going to have one really resentful, and tired person on your hands and that doesn't make for good sex..or a good relationship.

I also get a lot of guys that complain that their woman is "shy" and won't tell them her fantasies, masturbate for them, or even show them her body.  Ladies..ladies...ladies...we ALL have flaws, but the key to good sex is to act like you have the body of a goddess, if you are confident and you believe you are sexy as hell..then trust me, that is exactly what you're guy is going to think too!  He isn't going to be fixated on the things that you are self conscious about, if  you aren't fixated on them! 

As for not sharing fantasies...I hear so many women telling their men they don't fantasize.  Bull!!  Of course you do, you're human...you just aren't wanting to share your fantasies for fear of being shamed, or judged.  Fantasies are just that a FANTASY.  It's not reality and the sooner we realize that, the sooner we can release the shame that we feel about them.  A common fantasy of women is to be taken by a forceful lover..or "raped".  That doesn't mean that in real life ANY woman wants to be raped, because we sure as hell don't.  The fantasy is just about giving up control to a dominant male, it's not about the true act of violence that is rape.  So, if that is a fantasy she has..she may feel guilty or ashamed and not want to share it, it's up to you to assure her you know the difference between what she fantasizes about and what is reality.  Also, don't judge and that goes for both parties.  If your partner does share a fantasy and your first reaction is "That's gross!"...well, you have effectively shut down communication and any chance of them sharing another fantasy with you for the next 10 years, if ever.  If a partner shares a fantasy with you, they trust you and they are sharing a very intimate part of themselves with you.  Take it for what it is...don't make them feel bad about it, and you might find that sharing fantasies can be a very hot part of  your sex life!

Masturbation...this one is tricky, men want to watch women do it, and women don't want men to do it.  I'll explain.

Often times, women don't understand why a man would masturbate when they could have sex with them.  This makes them feel like they are somehow lacking, that he would choose his palm over their pussy.  Ladies, this isn't the case.  Men use masturbation most often for stress release, he wants something quick and satisfying without the time and effort that goes into sex.  Is this a problem?  No, unless is becomes his preference over sex.  If he is still giving it to you good, but sometimes masturbating then so what?  As long as you have an active sex life that you are happy with, then stop worrying about if he masturbates.  In fact, there was a study some years ago that I read about that said couples with the most active and satisfying sex lives also masturbated more than couples that rated their sex life as less satisfying or not as active.  So, in other words sex begets sex.  The more we have the more we want...and I'd rather it be his palm revving him up than another woman. 

Now, ladies...guys want to watch you masturbate.  It's sexy as hell, you're writhing around, moaning, your legs are open and he's getting to watch your wet fingers slide all over and into your lovely slit.  It's a feast for his eyes!! Don't deny him that!  I know you're worried about how you'll look, you're worried that it will be awkward.  It won't be, you are sharing your body with your lover, why would it be awkward?  You trust this person enough to take them inside of you, but you don't want them looking at you?  That doesn't make sense.  Often, the hardest part of getting over a hurdle like this is the first time....you start out tentative, and feeling awkward until you see the absolute desire and love in your partner's eyes and suddenly, it's not so awkward anymore.  You start to feel as sexy as he is seeing you....it's a huge turn on and can lead to a really great orgasm.  Plus, you have just shown him EXACTLY how you like to be fingered.  If nothing else, consider it a learning opportunity for him!

Sex is best when both partners are actively involved.  When there is honest and open communication.  When we feel safe and loved.  It's not rocket science, it's just sex.  So, lighten up..don't be selfish and just enjoy it!
desires-andso-much-more:

Feel my throat expand…



Thanks to www.pinktoybox.tumblr.com for the awesome pics/gifs! You rock!

Monday, March 24, 2014

Spread it open!

Ok, I'll admit..this post started out with me seeing a very hot gif and that got my mind thinking and my clit buzzing!

There is nothing sexier than when a man spreads my pussy lips apart....he is literally opening me up to his eyes, mouth, fingers and cock.  Until that moment when he pulls my lips apart, everything is hidden..my hard clit, my wetness, my opening.  Once he spreads me open, there is no more hiding, everything is on full display.

Maybe it's just me, but I love it when my partner looks at my pussy...stares at it.  It is such an intimate part of my body that I'm sharing with him, and to see him looking at it in awe...is so incredibly hot!  Plus, I don't care if you are thick or thin, your pussy is always plump, juicy and sexy!!

Personally, opening my legs for my partner is one of the parts of sex that I most anticipate.  That moment when I am giving him full access....offering him my pussy to do with as he wants.  My legs spread open and I put myself on display for his eyes, his cock, or his mouth.  It's a very submissive, but loving position for a woman to allow herself to be opened up in such a way and to have her slit be the center of focus.  As women, we often feel that our bodies aren't good enough, but it's very rare for a woman to think her pussy isn't good enough...it's probably the one part on our body that we don't have to be self conscious about!  Big clit or small, puffy long lips or tight thin ones...big labia or small, it's all good when our lover is looking at it!

So, the next time you are with your lover....spread your legs and let him open you up...let him look all he wants and I bet that you will both find your pussy is not only the center of physical pleasure, but also visual pleasure as well!




Thanks to www.eroticpics.tumblr.com for the awesome and very hot gifs!

Interracial love

So, I had someone leave me a comment on my blog asking for a post about interracial relationships.  This got me thinking.....

When it comes to these relationships why do we cast dispersions on humans loving each other?  The color of our skin is just that..the color of our skin, it has nothing to do with our heart, our emotions, or our ability to love.

I know that when it comes to interracial relationships, it's been said that "Once you go black, you won't go back!".....well, I say this isn't true. Again it's not about black or white, or tan.  It's about the PERSON and like all relationships, there are good and bad.  However, there will be those that say they aren't talking about the relationship, but the sex...

I have to say that there are guys with huge cocks....in every race.  There are also guys with small cocks...in every race.  If a guy is relying on his penis for his relationships, then there is a problem.  It doesn't matter if you are huge, or average or small, what matters is the love, communication and respect you show your partner.  Trust me, I'd rather have a small cock and a man that truly loves me, than a big cock on someone that could care less about me.  So, if the only factor in the relationship is cock size...you have bigger problems than I can fix in a blog post. 

I think the biggest hurdles interracial couples face isn't related to sex, but to cultural differences.  Beliefs may vary, religions may vary, morals and values may vary.  There are so many more things that go into a successful relationship than just sex. 

However, I will say that visually...I find interracial sex, very hot! The contrast of dark and light, can be mesmerizing.  Dark hands on pale breasts...or a white cock in between cocoa colored thighs.  Our eyes are drawn to contrast, and when we see it, it's hard to look away...especially when it involves naked bodies!

So, I say love who treats you well, regardless of the color of their skin.  The heart wants what it wants and it's colorblind for a reason. :)



Thanks to www.eroticpics.tumblr for the awesome hot pics!

Sunday, March 9, 2014

Are you a hottie?

I started thinking about what makes us hot to the opposite sex....is it our weight?...our smile?...our personality? 

Attraction is such an individual thing, it's based on our personal experiences, genetics, and I think just our natural tendencies.  What you find attractive in a partner, might not be something that I would find attractive and vice versa. 

Yes, we all know that beauty is typically seen in a symmetry of features.  Does, that mean that the majority of us without the "perfect" facial symmetry are unattractive? No, of course not!  Our society is also one that has decided that skinny is hot, and fat is not.  Does that mean that the thick girl will never get a date?  Nope!  Luckily, as humans we are a diverse group and just because there is a standard of measure used for beauty, it doesn't define who we love, who we want to have sex with, or who we are!

Have you ever met someone that you might not have thought was physically attractive....yet, over time, as you get to know them...they become MORE attractive to you?  I've had this happen....and I'm pretty sure that is how I've gotten most of my lovers over the years! lol  Personally I think, physical attraction is something that can immediately draw you to someone, but their personality is what makes them a true hottie....or not! 

Have you ever met someone that is beautiful to look at, but they are snarky, rude, and mean spirited?  Or, have you met someone that isn't what society defines as beautiful, however they are funny, kind and loving?  In my opinion, who a person is....is so much more important than how they look.  I often talk about looking at your partner through love goggles, that isn't a bad thing!  When you look at your partner...or future partner with eyes that see more than just their physical traits, then you can see their true beauty. 

I wish we all saw each other for who we really are inside, instead of what we look like.  I have a feeling the world would look very different.  So, don't immediately discount someone that isn't your ideal, you might be overlooking the best thing that has ever happened to you!



The pic above is me, please DO NOT copy, print, save, or transmit it without my permission.

C U R V Y - L I C I O U S

Friday, February 28, 2014

Put your name on it!

I was looking at tattoos earlier and there was a whole section about regrets...and most of the regrets were the names of lover's forever etched onto your body.  However, just because you don't want to make a permanent leap, that doesn't mean you still can't have some fun and let your lover put their name on it! ;)

I actually had a lover write his name across my pussy after a very sexy and vigorous weekend.  It was very erotic having him "mark" my pussy in such a way.  Laying there, panting..my legs spread and my pussy all pink, puffy and cummy and he's between my thighs signing his handiwork.  It turned us both on so much that it lead to several more vigorous rounds of sex!  Plus, I'll admit to feeling very naughty walking around for several days knowing his name was written across my pussy.  I felt owned, loved, desired and more than a little naughty! 

I think that we sometimes spicing things up in the bedroom can be as simple as breaking out a Sharpie and putting your name on it!  Supposedly, Brad Pitt has a tattoo of a doodle that Angelina Jolie put on his body...I bet you it was after sex! He went the extra step, but that doesn't mean that a less permanent option wouldn't still sizzle things up!  You can also leave little notes on your body for your lover to find...lick here, insert here, kiss here....don't think that it just has to be a just name, your body is a blank canvas, lead him or her on a scavenger hunt for your orgasm!

There are many ways to mark your partner as yours.  There can be scratches down his back, fingertip bruises on her thighs....he can put his cum in you, she can rub her pussy juice on him.  These are all ways to say "This one belongs to me!"  However, actually putting your name on it, says it in a whole new possessive way.

If you aren't going to go with a tattoo...then you do have options, from Henna, which has been used in India for years and it fades away gradually over a few weeks.  Or the good old trusty Sharpie, which can last for a  few days.  If you want something even less permanent than that, there is always body paint.  The medium you use isn't as important as the feeling you get from having a visual reminder that your body isn't just your own...it's shared with your partner.
simplewishes:

the power of the pen
closetexhibitionist:

Go on…. ; )
Thanks to www.eroticpics.tumblr.com for the great pics.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Lingerie lovers among us!

So, I was looking through pictures trying to get a spark of blogging motivation and I noticed lingerie...lots of sexy slinky things and it got me started thinking, there must be lingerie lovers among us!

Lingerie can be beautiful, it can be sexy, it can be innocent, it can be raunchy....so no matter who you are, or what you're into...there is lingerie for that!

Yes, we wear it for the men in our lives, we know you love it.  However, we also wear it for ourselves.  A sexy little secret under our clothes that makes us feel pretty, sultry, beautiful.  Never underestimate the power of lingerie!  I always had a pre-date ritual.  I'd shower, shave everything ;)..fix my hair and make up and then select the perfect lingerie.   

I used to think that guys were happy if you were naked, but in reality most of them love to unwrap the package!  As women, we love beautiful things...and while your man might appreciate that, I have yet to find a guy that doesn't get an instant boner when staring at a pair of crotchless panties!  Men love lingerie, but they also love easy access!  So, no matter how pretty that corset is, if it has 100 buttons or laces that will take forever to undo...skip it, or plan on keeping it on during sex!

Keeping lingerie on during sex is harder than it sounds...most men like looking but then want it OFF.  However, there are the few that really enjoy trying to work around it.  They love the feel of your legs covered in  thigh high stockings wrapped around them, or seeing you underneath them with the crotch of your panties pulled to one side and your bra pushed down beneath your breasts...it makes their cock explode! 

Lingerie can also prolong the fun try keeping your panties on for as long as possible.  Let him tear them off you, or even use them as a sexy prop during sex!  Let him see the wet crotch, suck your pussy through them or even sniff them if he wants!  The best part about lingerie it isn't just something you throw on every day, it's something that can set you apart...ignite passion...boost confidence and get you laid!  So, the next time  you need new lingerie, take your time and be choosey, it's more important than you thought! ;)

Oh, one more thing...just be sure to NOT wear a metal studded teddy underneath your clothes to the airport, it will get you stopped and searched, and it's a lot more embarrassing than you think to try and explain why the metal detector keeps going off in the vicinity of your crotch! lol ;)



get back to work!



Thanks to www.pinktoybox.tumblr.com for the awesome pics!

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Missionary is NOT vanilla!

I personally love missionary position, it's my favorite!  Some people say it's boring or vanilla...I say, you're doing it wrong!  Missionary is a position that can be sensual, dominant, intense, sexy, and fun!  To prove my point, I'm going to post several of the hottest missionary gifs I can find, I bet I can convince you that missionary sex is anything BUT boring! ;)

I really like this one, you can tell he's going deep from the look on her face and how he's got her legs pushed back!  Yeah...give me some of that!!
idletyoudothat:

http://idletyoudothat.tumblr.com/
This one is a little wilder, a little rougher!

Just a slight change of angle and suddenly, it's hitting all the right spots! 

I don't think she's bored, looks like to me she's enjoying getting it fast and deep!
luvs2duit:

Sometimes hard, fast and deep is the only way Honey wants it!
I love the intensity in this one, he is totally focused on thrusting and she just wants more!

If you say you don't want to try this...I won't believe you! ;)

all gifs via www.eroticpics.tumblr.com Thanks!